Childless Parents Newsletter, Autumn 2021

Newsletter for Childless Parents | www.tcf.org.uk 4 Not an Easy Word Hope is not an easy word for grievers – But we, more than most others, Need to understand What hope can mean for us. Hope means finding the strength to live with grief. Hope means nurturing with grace the joy of remembrance. Hope means embracing With tenderness and pride Our own life And the gifts left to us By those we have lost. I watched them in the swimming pool, a mother with her son and remembrances came flooding back of all the watery things we’d done. Armbands over little hands, water wings,whirling Swirling, holding you, teaching you to swim. Ring a ring a roses atishoo atishoo we all fall down as you have fallen now into an untimely death. If I hold my breath for long enough, could I drown? Splashing bathtimes, taps and soaps, ‘mincing’ hair instead of rinsing, wetness drying we enjoyed wrapping you in fluffy towels cuddles with my little boy. Exclaiming over rainbows, blowing bubbles in the air, jumping in and out of waves, flashbacks, seaside beaches, castles in many sands. Puddle days, anoraks and welly boots, streams, rivers, fishing, many trips, canoes, rowing boats, different ships, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream. I am trying to be grateful for the years we were allowed. As your mother I was proud. You were always best at what you did, it was a gift you had, and most of these watery memories I can now hold inside. They don’t come gushing out so fast pouring down my face dripping memories in water of a mother child embrace. Jean Beith Sascha Wagner TCF Aurora, CO Hope Watery Memories