Childless Parents Newsletter, Winter 2020

Newsletter for Childless Parents | www.tcf.org.uk 10 watched my first Christmas film of the year (yes, I know it is early but we always used to start during October half term) and am planning on making our traditional sausage rolls next week to freeze ready for Christmas. I have made my present list and started buying, I am probably about half way through, and I have written some of the Christmas cards. We have planned where we hope to be able to go on Xmas day… the morning with my parents, sister and nephew, and lunch with my husband’s parents. We also hope to get away and see our friends in Plymouth for the period between Xmas and New Year. Their home is warm and inviting, a house that feels like a second home, where we can be us in whatever way we need without having to put on a show. It is a house full of people who are like a second family and where we feel truly comfortable. It does not feel as exciting, obviously, but I am starting to feel a “little” bit festive. The only thing I do not know is what to do for Becca’s birthday on Christmas Eve. She should be turning 24 but will be forever 22. I want to do something to celebrate her life but it is hard to plan when we do not know what tier we will be in, if there will be a lockdown, or anything really. Instead I am having to wait and see, and then we will make our plans closer to the time if we are able. Last year we went to a pub with 40+ family and friends to remember her and, as hard it was, I was grateful for the celebrating so I am sure we will do something each year, just like we did when she was alive. After Xmas we have my birthday, followed just over a week later with the anniversary of the Becca’s death… those I am not thinking about too much yet otherwise I may be overwhelmed so I am just focussing on this year, on remembering my smart, funny, generous, crazy girl in all her glory and celebrating the best person I have ever known, who I am so grateful I got to call mine. Wishing you all peaceful festive season, I will raise a glass and light a candle for all our wonderful sons and daughters. Jacqui Oxlade, Becca’s Mum