Compassion Magazine Winter 2022

Winter 2022 - Compassion | www.tcf.org.uk 14 The second part of the book is a treasure trove of ideas to help yourself and I think that’s something we need when we’re so badly wounded and struggling to even get up in the morning. I should say that, as well as being a bereaved mum, Vanessa is also a nutritional therapist and wellbeing coach and is now a grief coach and mentor so all of her advice is based on her considerable knowledge and of course her own experience. I actually don’t know where to start, because there’s so much to write about, but the first chapter which addresses physical problems like poor appetite, difficulty in sleeping, dehydration and low energy levels is a great help in itself. For example, knowing which supplements can help when you’re barely able to eat, could support your immune system and help prevent you from going down with cold after cold because you have no resistance. There’s also advice on supporting your mental health with counselling or EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) or maybe Reiki or aromatherapy, with using meditation and visualisation to help with healing, on ways to build resilience and nurture your continuing bond with your child. Then there’s a chapter about who can help you… friends, TCF, pets for example and one on going forward into the future. There is something here for everyone. The epilogue briefly looks at the second year and again I found myself saying “yes that’s what I thought” when Vanessa writes that the second year is no better or worse than the first but is simply different. I thoroughly recommend this book, especially for newly bereaved parents. In my experience, both personal and with the library, I know how difficult it is to concentrate and books written clearly, with the text broken into digestible chunks, are what we need. Also the honest and immediate way Vanessa tells her story makes it easy to connect with someone who knows what it feels like to grieve for a child. Add to that her really useful advice and this book is excellent. By the time you read this, I will have acquired copies of it for the library. It is also available from Amazon and from the publisher. Mary Hartley