Grieving for Our Young Child (2-10)

UK Helpline: 0345 123 2304 | www.tcf.org.uk forward to, and we with them. Now life can feel stark and empty. Our heart aches. Our home is perhaps quieter now than it was before. Even if we have other children, the soundtrack of our home is changed by our child’s absence. Our daily lives have been very closely intertwined with our children. They need us and we need them. It can be very difficult to know what to do with all the love and care that we still have but can no longer physically give to our child who has died. We may feel we have lost our own identity. There are other factors that could make this loss even harder to bear, such as if we do not have a supportive relationship with a partner who will walk with us through our grief. If we have no other children, we could be in despair. If we have other children, it can be a great struggle to care for them while in a state of acute grief. Our feelings We may be experiencing strong emotions of grief, anger and despair. Sometimes we might direct these feelings at others, as we feel the need to place blame even when there is none. If we have a partner, we may feel like we have let them down in the way we looked after our child, or vice versa. We could also feel as though we have failed as a unit. As a lone parent, we may experience a similar sense of guilt. We are plagued by ‘what ifs’: could I have done more? It is natural for us to have these questions, but also equally important to realise that usually feelings of responsibility and guilt are unfounded. In most circumstances, our child’s death could not have been prevented by us or anybody else. There may be resentfulness and jealously towards other parents as their lives carry on as normal; these feelings are understandable and they will soften as time passes. We may find there is a certain expectation from others as to how we should react and cope. We may be responsible for contacting family and friends, as well as our child’s school. Relaying this terrible