Grieving the Death of a Twin Child

One of a series of leaflets published by The Compassionate Friends Twinless Twins - twinlesstwins.org This US based charity that gives support to anyone who has lost a twin at any age, and enables the surviving twin to get in touch with other surviving twins of the same age. Their website includes a range of resources. Going forward The love we have for our child did not end when they died. We keep loving them and thinking about them. Finding ways to channel our love and thoughts can be helpful as we adjust to their absence. Of course, this is true also for their twin. Many of us find it very important to spend time on activities that recognise and keep alive the memories of our children. Ideas for this are virtually endless, such as: organising photos of them, making a memory box, arranging for a tree to be planted in their honour, visiting places our child loved, and many more. (See the TCF Remembering our Child Handbook for a wide range of ideas.) Including the surviving twin (and other children) in these remembrance activities, if they wish, can give them a positive focus for their grief. However, we should also understand that they may have different ways in which they wish to remember their twin. This might particularly be the case if they are teenagers or adults. What is most important is that each of us is acknowledging their twin in the ways that feel right to us. Although they are no longer physically present, they still have a place in our hearts and lives. Adjusting to life without our child takes a long time, and we will need to be patient with ourselves. Our grief may be more difficult to cope with at certain times of the year, such as holidays and special occasions. Seeing the pain that their twin is experiencing will also be