UK Helpline: 0345 123 2304 | tcf.org.uk “It’s been a struggle to get out of the house, but it seems to help my mood when I do.” It is important not to become isolated, although this might be easier said than done. We may choose to take a temporary break from customary activities, such as participation in an exercise group or a class. However, most of us discover that it helps to spend at least a little time with other people, in whatever ways we can manage. Relationships For those of us in a relationship, the shattering experience of our child’s death may create tensions within our marriage or partnership. The understanding developed over the years will be put to a severe test. We feel that we should be able to help each other, but we are individuals who need to grieve in our own way, at our own pace. Being in so much pain, we may not have the emotional strength to comfort each other as we would wish. Our partner’s grief pattern may be difficult to understand. Some people express their grief openly, sharing their emotions and talking it through. Others are more silent. They might bury themselves in their work or other activities, and not appear able to confront their grief head on. Communication, tolerance, affection and patience are essential in helping each other through this devastating experience. In addition, many of us live in blended families, and the ways in which a biological parent and a step-parent grieve the loss of their child may, quite naturally, be different. For those of us who are lone parents, it may be difficult to bear the pain of our grief without someone to share it with. If the other parent has previously died, the loss of our child can cause us to relive those painful memories, too. Finding friendship with other bereaved parents through organisations such as TCF could help us avoid becoming isolated in our grief.
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