SIBBS Newsletter, Autumn 2020

SIBBS Newsletter, Autumn 2020 | www.tcf.org.uk 3 Hello friends, A very warm welcome to your Autumn issue of the SIBBS newsletter. Does anyone else feel like the world is holding its breath for things to go back to the way they were? It’s almost as though we’re waiting en mass for someone with authority to say ‘it’s ok people, it’s all going to be fine…crack on!’ I heard a programme on Radio 4 (yes, I’m getting old) that featured composer Leonard Slatkin talking about Samuel Barber’s Adagio for Strings. You’ve almost definitely heard the piece, which has become synonymous with grief. It is strongly associated with the 9/11 tragedy since this stunning performance at the last night of the 2011 proms. Anyway, at 7.33 minutes into the piece there’s this pause. It’s an unusually long pause within a piece of music. So intense is this pause, Slatkin explained, he’s always concerned that the audience will mistakenly start to clap the end of the performance. Life in this uncertain moment feels somewhat like this pause. We’re waiting, hanging on, anticipating. For many, there’s a longing for a return to normal. For us, however, our ‘normal’ ended with the loss of our sister or brother. We’ve already had to live through (overused phrase alert…) unprecedented times. We’ve had to learn to try and adapt to this the unimaginable - and we now know that we can survive anything. That’s not to diminish the many challenges that come with the current uncertainties. If your grief is feeling harder than normal (which it is, for many), please do try and talk to somebody about it: a trusted friend, family member, our SIBBS Facebook community or a counsellor. Wishing you strength and peace through this pause and beyond. In friendship, Hayley x Letter from the editor “We all have two lives. The second one starts when we realise we only have one” (Confucius) Photo by Nick Fewings