SIBBS Newsletter Summer 2022

SIBBS Newsletter, Summer 2022 | www.tcf.org.uk 7 relationship as well. Comments throughout the interviews indicated a set of assumptions about the future, making clear that participants held a number of ideals about how the sibling relationship would have unfolded over time. For example, it was believed that via siblings, people would become aunts/uncles and gain a brother or sister-in- law. It was also suggested that siblings could potentially support one another in the later stages of life or assist in the care of elderly parents. In addition, participants noted that siblings uniquely possess shared memories of childhood and a mutual understanding that goes beyond words. Even those who weren’t close to their sibling believed that this knowledge could prove invaluable over the course of their lifetime. The sibling relationship can therefore be understood as unique and irreplaceable, even when people feel close to others, such as friends or cousins. As such, most participants expected to grow up and grow old with their brother or sister, recognising the permanence of the tie between them regardless of their current closeness. This meant that even those who weren’t amicable remained open to the possibility of reconciliation in the future. Consequently, siblings expressed great sadness not only for the brother and/or sister who had died but also for the aspects of their relationship that would never come to be. Moving away from the sibling relationship directly, the interviews highlighted the potential value of the deceased sibling’s friends as a source of support and information about the deceased. For example, they were able to offer an alternative insight into the sibling’s character and how they felt about the sibling relationship. While not all participants valued or had access to these conversations, a number expressed their appreciation of the insight gained via this channel. Another significant relationship raised was that with nieces and nephews. Not many participants had nieces or nephews but those who did often considered it to be their responsibility to inform this younger generation about their mum or dad and some even adopted semi- parenting roles with them.