TCF News Autumn 2022

Autumn 2022 - TCF Newsletter | www.tcf.org.uk 3 Volunteer Focus Our spotlight for this edition is on volunteers, Adrian and Carol Keach who are based in Kettering in Northamptonshire. Here they share their experience of setting up and running a local support group for bereaved parents which ran for many years. As well as offering their wonderful empathy and understanding to parents, over the years Adrian, Carol and Kettering TCF group members have raised thousands of pounds for our charity through their annual summer fundraising event. A huge thank you Adrian and Carol for all you have done for others through TCF and all you continue to offer. Here they tell us all about their time with TCF: Having the opportunity to form a TCF Support Group has been one of the most fulfilling, challenging and time absorbing things we have done since the death of our younger daughter, Naomi, at the age of 14. It has given us a focus and many special friendships have developed over many years. So how did we begin? Our story begins in the 1990’s about two years after Naomi died when we felt a need to turn our sadness into something positive and we felt able to reach out to others who were treading the same painful path. So with considerable trepidation Carol knocked on the door of a local family whom we knew had recently lost one of their children, and offered details of the support provided by the Compassionate Friends and an invitation to coffee. In time we gradually became aware of other families in our area who had suffered loss. We then embarked upon TCF training for new Contacts which gave us the confidence and guidelines to follow in running a support group. We also learnt of other bereaved parents through contact with the Helpline. Our small group gradually grew in number and our local church members were, and continue to be, very supportive and before long we were able to involve them in raising funds at a coffee morning in our back garden, to which friends and neighbours also came. Gradually the name of TCF became better known in our area and our group outgrew meeting in our home and so we moved our meetings into our former village Rectory. Each year we continued to hold our fund raising day but on a much larger scale on the Rectory lawn to which many villagers came and contributed very generously. It was an excellent way to raise funds but also to create a team spirit with our TCF members working together, as well as promoting the work of the charity. This was followed by a bring and share picnic lunch until we were offered some excellent refreshments by our local Tesco. Throughout the year we held monthly afternoon meetings and evening meetings for those in work. We also found that holding a lunch in January provided by outside caterers gave us a helpful focus and time to relax together after the stress of the Christmas period. We also arranged other social events such as quiz nights, occasional walks - even an outing to the TCF office when it was in Deptford. As time went on we were able to give some of our older members a specific role within the group as we planned for the future. However, nothing stays the same for ever. Prior to the pandemic we recognised that a number of our members no longer needed the level of support offered to the newly bereaved but welcomed the opportunity instead to occasionally socialise together. So it was our intention to create a much smaller group for the Adrian and Carol Keach