Helping Parents When Their Child Dies at University

One of a series of leaflets published by The Compassionate Friends It will save the parents a lot of stress if the Parent Contact is able to co- ordinate between the different University Departments, such as Student Wellbeing, Public and Media Relations, Student Funding, Library Service, Finance, and Halls of Residence and/or landlords if they are registered with the university. This can avoid painful scenarios, for example parents receiving repeated reminders for the return of library books or for the payment of other fees. Members of staff who knew the student In addition to practical communications from the Parent Contact, most parents would greatly appreciate hearing from staff who knew their child personally, such as tutors or lecturers. Condolences and positive reflections could also come from the university chaplain. If parents are unable to visit the university There may be circumstances which prevent parents from visiting the university or deny them the opportunity to meet their designated Parent Contact in person. In such testing circumstances communication is crucial. Parents could be invited to nominate the method that feels right for them, such as email, phone or video conferencing. In the words of bereaved parents: “We need patience and support in decision-making” Our child’s death will have many practical implications. If our interaction with you involves any decision-making, please be patient with us. Although we may ask you questions and try to listen to the information you provide, we may find it difficult to concentrate and to take everything on board. As a result, we may need extra time and an opportunity to return later to continue the conversation, if possible. Providing us with information on paper could be helpful, and/or possibly in alternative formats, depending on our particular access needs.