Our grief following the accidental death of our child

One of a series of leaflets published by The Compassionate Friends It is devastating to be confronted with the sudden accidental death of a child, at any age. Our child has been taken from us in a shocking event that was beyond our control. Our life is changed for ever in an instant. ‘Accidental death’ is a broad term. What happened to our child could have been completely unpredictable. On the other hand, the term ‘accident’ might seem inappropriate if their death could have been prevented. There may be individuals or organisations who bear some blame. Perhaps safety procedures were not followed, or unwise choices were made. Our heartbreak and anguish might threaten to overwhelm us, although sometimes the shock of a huge personal tragedy can act to cushion us from reality for a while. Unanswered questions or excruciating memories about the circumstances in which our child died can dominate our thoughts. We may struggle with anger and resentment towards those who could have prevented the accident. Surviving this grief is not going to be easy. We hope that this leaflet, written by bereaved parents, will give you some ideas about how to find your way forward. Note: This leaflet looks at general issues following the accidental death of a child. The Compassionate Friends (TCF) has also published separate leaflets on bereavement following road traffic incidents or substance use. Please see: Bereaved through drug or alcohol use and When our child has died following a road incident ( tcf.org.uk ) Our grief following the accidental death of our child