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TCF walks are back!
We’ve turned the corner of this winter but still have a little way to go. As we look forward to Spring, TCF will be organising a series of monthly walks through to the Autumn.
2022 will be the fourth year of our London Walks program which grows in popularity each year. The walks are free to all bereaved parents, grandparents and siblings, but all donations are gratefully received.
For some, joining a walk has been their first contact with TCF. Many bereaved parents join the walks regularly and newcomers are warmly welcomed. On every walk there tends to be a mix of new and returning walkers.
The walks are led by bereaved dad Terry Ahern, who is an experienced walk leader and has considerable knowledge of our capital city. The walks often visit places that many have never been to before.
In Terry’s introduction before every walk, he comments that you are in the best company because everyone on the walk with you has lost a child, grandchild or sibling. There are no awkward conversations, you can feel at ease.
Some come along with a partner or family member, others on their own. Whichever way, everyone is welcome and becomes a valued part of our walking community.
There is a cafe lunch stop included but for those wishing to bring a packed lunch there will be a suitable area nearby.
The route begins by meeting at a central station and normally ends close to an underground or railway station with an option to stay a little longer for a well-earned drink at a traditional pub.
For this year, the walks will again alternate between green rand urban areas with commentary on places of interest along the way.
Terry has planned some walks this year which will explore charming parts of the city not on the normal tourist trail such as Islington, Cannonbury and Stoke Newington. We will walk along, not just the Thames but London’s other river, the Lea. There’s lots to look forward to!
In addition and in a change from our usual format, for the first time, there will be a walk embracing the concept of Walking Meditation & Mindfulness. This walk will be in the countryside within easy reach of London, so a 30 minute journey from a mainline station. More details of this will follow.
Save the Date
The first walk for 2022 will be on Saturday 23rd April in Richmond. Those who have been on this walk before will know that the highlight will be the ‘Isabella Plantation’ which should be awash with colour from the incredible collection of azaleas, rhododendron and other beautiful blooms. Find out more details shortly
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One man cycling!
On 28 September 2021, 4 years after the death of his son, Stevie, by suicide, Gary Goodwin set off on his epic challenge - to cycle the length of the United Kingdom.
Gary commented... "I have always wanted to cycle from Lands End to John O Groats from a young age. So what better reason to tackle the task by raising money and marking Stevie’s life. I plan to start the solo cycle on the 28/09/2021 (Stevie’s 4th anniversary)... I’m not a young chap so therefore this will not be a speedy journey but more about getting to the finish line!"
Well, he made it and on 27 October he reached his goal, after an incredible and gruelling 922 miles!
Total time cycling; 95.36 hours or 3 days 9 hours
Total climb; 48,818 feet
Estimated revolutions for entire journey (based on averages); 400,512
Gary raised over £2000 for the The Compassionate Friends and you can still donate here . These vital funds will go towards supporting our work with bereaved parents.
Congratulations, Gary, on your amazing challenge and a huge THANKYOU from everyone at The Compassionate Friends.
Back in person - bereavement support days
We have been delighted to be able to welcome bereaved parents back to our in-person mini retreat days offering support, understanding and friendship. So far we have run these supportive days in Glasgow (September) and Romsey in Hampshire (October). Find out about the next days here and we hope to run more in 2022.
Bereaved parent Vera, writes about her experience of the Glasgow support day:
On Saturday 25th September I attended the Compassionate Friends gathering in Glasgow. I was awake early in anticipation, feeling a little nervous about the day ahead. The following day my son, Peter, would have been gone 3 years, just didn’t seem at all possible, those 3 years have been a rollercoaster of emotions, deep heartache and sadness, misunderstandings and no guarantee that things would improve any time soon. So how would this day go? Who would I meet? How would I feel at the end of the day? I arrived all jittery and nervous, spilling my welcome cuppa and I went into the room, took a seat and all nerves were left behind at the door.
I sat and chatted and talked about Peter to a bunch of strangers, but not really, I felt more comfortable than I had felt in a long time, they weren’t strangers for long. We were put into small groups, my little group was talkative and friendly and I felt we listened to each other. We heard each other’s stories, as sad and upsetting as they were, it felt good to talk. I realised how much I’d been holding in and wearing the ‘mask’, it felt good to let go and speak Peter’s name and tell people what a wonderful son he was and how lovely to talk about their children to.
I later took part in the writing group and we all said we couldn’t write, how wrong we were, once started it was difficult to stop, our feelings and thoughts coming through with pen and paper once again being able to talk and tell of our experiences.
A different group in the afternoon, about the future and ways of coping, I thought maybe I’d said one or two silly things, whilst at one time I would have worried about that, I didn’t, I knew people would understand. I think that’s what it’s all about, getting together, say how we feel and what’s happened to us since the death of our child, without feeling wrong for doing so. Such a worthwhile thing to do, it’s the best way of getting rid of the feeling that somehow we should be ‘getting better’, ‘moving on’ ‘no longer grieving’ as I think people expect us to do. There is no wrong way to grieve, we grieve our own way, but it’s oh so good to get together and talk.
I would recommend giving a day away with TCF a try, it’s last place you want to be, right? Yes and no, it’s the best place to be if you’re a bereaved parent.
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Each year thousands of parents suffer the loss of a son or a daughter. Please help TCF to support families in their time of greatest need.
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