Grieving for a baby

As soon as we know that we are expecting a baby, our baby feels a part of us. When our baby dies, at whatever age and from whatever cause, part of us dies too. Although we knew so little of him or her and our time with them has been so short, the loss can be overwhelming; the life we looked forward to sharing will now not happen and we shall never know the person they would have become in adulthood.

TCF’s leaflet Grieving For Our Baby looks at the grief of losing a baby through miscarriage or stillbirth, where there has been no relationship outside the womb; at neonatal death, where we may not be able to hold our baby; the loss of one of multiple births; and the shock of sudden infant death syndrome (cot death).

It also covers managing contact with health professionals and the police; practicalities like what to do with the baby things waiting at home; the specific feelings of mothers, of fathers and of grandparents; the reaction of friends and family; and telling your other children that their brother or sister has died. Our leaflet Our Surviving Children discusses how children of different ages understand death, and how we can help them.

Some of us will have another baby and our leaflet explores how we might integrate the memories of our baby into our story, affirming that he or she lived and is forever part of our family.

If you have lost a baby from one month old up to a pre-school child and would like to join TCF's private Facebook group for parents who have suffered the loss of a baby, toddler or pre-school child, contact Kate and Heather at info@tcf.org.uk and ask to join. We will ask you a few questions about your loss (in order to keep the group safe and secure for bereaved parents only), and then be able to email you a link to join the group. We also offer occasional online support group meetings for loss of a baby from one month old up to a pre-school child, further details here https://www.tcf.org.uk/events/?catid=1

Please see below details of more appropriate organisations offering support particularly around miscarriage, stillbirth and other neo-natal loss

Find other helpful organisations here.