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We keep him close, always

When I was asked recently to speak about my “grief journey” to a group of bereaved parents, my first reaction was that it wasn’t such a good idea. I was very worried that it would trigger something in me. Because seven years ago, I watched my 14-year-old son Kadian ride down a hill on a bicycle, and into a road where he was struck by a truck. He died in front of me.

I was also anxious about making generalisations – after all, everyone’s experience is different. There is no blueprint or boilerplate for how to cope with such a calamity. I didn’t want to cause anyone additional pain.

I decided to take a pass.

Later, I took my dog out for a walk in the hills behind our house. And there, up in the yew tree forest, I thought some more. What if I had heard someone speak on this subject seven years ago? What would I have liked them to say? What would have made a difference to me back then?

So, here is what I came up with.

Read more here: www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/jan/18/keep-close-always-how-survived-loss-teenage-son-thomas-harding

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