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Grieving for a baby

As soon as we know that we are expecting a baby, our baby feels a part of us. When our baby dies, at whatever age and from whatever cause, part of us dies too. Although we knew so little of him or her and our time with them has been so short, the loss can be overwhelming; the life we looked forward to sharing will now not happen and we shall never know the person they would have become in adulthood.

TCF’s leaflet Grieving For Our Baby looks at the grief of losing a baby through miscarriage or stillbirth, where there has been no relationship outside the womb; at neonatal death, where we may not be able to hold our baby; the loss of one of multiple births; and the shock of sudden infant death syndrome (cot death).

It also covers managing contact with health professionals and the police; practicalities like what to do with the baby things waiting at home; the specific feelings of mothers, of fathers and of grandparents; the reaction of friends and family; and telling your other children that their brother or sister has died. Our leaflet Our Surviving Children discusses how children of different ages understand death, and how we can help them.

Some of us will have another baby and our leaflet explores how we might integrate the memories of our baby into our story, affirming that he or she lived and is forever part of our family.

Support our work

Each year thousands of parents suffer the loss of a son or a daughter. Please help us to support families in their time of greatest need.

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